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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25700626">the atheist in the foxhole</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/SheOfBadIdeas/pseuds/SheOfBadIdeas'>SheOfBadIdeas</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Dimension 20 (Web Series)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Discussion of character death, Gen, War</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-04</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 08:22:23</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Teen And Up Audiences</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>644</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25700626</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/SheOfBadIdeas/pseuds/SheOfBadIdeas</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p><i>We would’ve been sisters</i>, Ruby thinks, <i>if we’d met at a different time</i>.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Jet Rocks &amp; Ruby Rocks, Saccharina Frostwhip &amp; Ruby Rocks</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>23</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>the atheist in the foxhole</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Ruby and Jet used to play War in the castle courtyard, sat cross-legged beneath their favorite aspartame tree as they dealt the cards. Jet usually won; <em>“Sorry, Ruby, but my King of Clubs beats your Jack of Hearts.”</em></p><p>Now, Ruby spits dirt and blood out of her mouth and commands her troops to attack from hiding. Her muscles ache and throb from bracing against the onslaught of arrows. There’s blood rushing in her ears so loudly that she feels like her head is submerged in the Cola River. Without a clear line of sight on her family, she is left to wonder if everyone she loves has already died, and her gut roils with the sickening uncertainty of it.</p><p>She can’t help but question whether this is truly what Jet dreamed of when she dreamed of battle, or if she just dreamt of the aftermath.</p><p>Ahead of her, Saccharina attacks the ballistae from atop her flaming red dragon, effortlessly raining destruction on the castle as though it isn’t Ruby’s home she’s demolishing. Logically, she understands that Saccharina is only doing what she must, but the emotional part of her finds it just so fitting: Saccharina bursting into their home by force, with no regard for the people who had been there before her. It’s just another thing that Saccharina thinks is hers to take.</p><p>Saccharina, Queen of Spades, casts a devastating lightning bolt on the row of archers, splitting the sky above Castle Candia with a gruesome crack as Cinnamon swoops down to tear at another ballista. Ruby almost wants to curse the easy grace of their attacks, coated as she is in wet earth and viscera. Saccharina fights a war the same way Jet used to play at it, Ruby reckons: devastatingly competent, and maybe just a little bit gleeful.</p><p>A lot of things about Saccharina remind Ruby of Jet, really, but never in a way that’s comforting. Instead, every reminder seems to reach into Ruby’s stomach and twist at her insides, as if to say <em>look how hollow you are now! </em>It hurts to look at Saccharina and see Jet’s fighting spirit, to see her clever mind, to see her drive to do right, but to have all those qualities reflected back through a funhouse mirror.</p><p>It would be different if Jet were still here. The ways that Jet and Saccharina differ would be intriguing, exciting. Saccharina would tell them stories of her childhood and Jet and Ruby would sit, rapt, thoroughly impressed at how strong she had to have been to survive those circumstances. Saccharina would sit, enthralled, as Jet and Ruby taught her twinspeak and showed her all of the castle’s secret passageways. Caramelinda would have no idea how to deal with the tricks of a sorceress as powerful as Saccharina; Amethar would try to smother his pride as Ruby picked up new tricks from her.</p><p><em>We would’ve been sisters</em>, Ruby thinks,<em> if we’d met at a different time</em>. And isn’t that the crux of it?</p><p>A terrible clatter brings Ruby back to the battle, and she watches as a handful of her soldiers fall lifelessly to the ground. Her heart pangs dully, a pale echo of grief ringing through her chest as she watches their bodies crumple. She wishes she felt more for them, wishes she could honor their sacrifices by paying them proper respects, but Ruby can hardly see the casualties in front of her beyond the yawning cavern of the losses she’s already faced.</p><p>Even if she had the capacity, though, she wouldn’t have the time, so she simply orders her squadron to charge forward and attack again. She knows she’s winning the fight, knows that her soldiers outnumber their opponents. Still, she can’t help the gnawing feeling that she’s losing a far more important battle.</p><p><em>Oh well</em>, she thinks. Ruby never really liked playing War, anyway.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>hi i love both saccharina and ruby and think they're being played brilliantly so i thought i'd write a little piece before the finale!</p><p>i'm at rubyofhouserocks.tumblr.com if you wanna message me or send me a prompt :) &lt;3</p></blockquote></div></div>
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